The Power of Being Present Now

I just lost what I considered an inspired blog post by pushing a wrong button on my computer. Poof- gone, no thanks to autosave. I have to decide whether to reconstruct it or not. I know what it said and what message it conveyed, but I now get to reconsider whether I should rewrite it… Is the message worth conveying enough to take the time to do it?

Sometimes in life things, opportunities and people disappear- poof! and we don’t get that chance to interact with them again. Then we are left to wonder whether we have done enough so far anyway, or whether it’s worth doing it over again, if we can.

I guess to live a life with fewest regrets it comes down to living as fully in each moment as possible. Not always easy, even if we know the formula. It takes a fair amount of personal focus, mental discipline and emotional steadiness. And just plain old not being distracted; not an easy feat in our uber-tantalizing consumer oriented sound-bite society. I know in my case I can be fully present- in fact for me it’s part of getting into my creative flow zone….except I’m often present at multiple things at once. So….does that dilute the formula? Yes, AND I also experience lots more than many people. But I suspect there are trade-offs over time in depth of certain experiences. Mostly in relationships, or in any area where you desire mastery, because they take consistent investments of attention and intention over time.

Maybe I’m thinking of this because we recently passed the birthday of my now deceased older brother. He died rather suddenly, poof, and we never got a chance to say goodbye. No second chance, except in the vibrational world. Worse, we had assumed we’d both be there for each other for a long time, so unwittingly squandered the time we had. Oh well. I can’t rectify that relationship, but I bet I can do something with the ones in front of me now.

Regret is best designed out ahead of time and involves investment in being present in your chosen focus areas, be they relationships or projects. It takes mental discipline which must be built up over time, but the rewards are rich and well worth the investment.

Right now, set your timer for 2 minutes, then close your eyes, sit still, and breathe in slowly and deeply through your nose then slowly out your mouth. Pay attention to your body sensations, notice what sounds your hear in your environment, and tune in to how your mind is behaving. If you actually concentrate like this for 2 minutes a day, very soon you are thinking and acting from a more grounded position of power. Now that’s worth investing in!

Happiness! Future Or Present?

Are you living your life on the deferred plan? Some people are waiting for that special moment to be happy. Waiting for the perfect mate, waiting for the right job, waiting for the house to be paid off, waiting for the kids to finish college. If you keep waiting for the perfect moment to be happy, you will never be happy.

You have to be happy right now, in the present, then you will be happy in the future. Happiness is a mental habit, a mental attitude, and if it is not learned and practiced in the present, it will never be experienced.

Happiness cannot be waited upon until all problems are solved. Every time a problem is solved another one comes along. Life is a series of problems. If you are to be happy at all, you must be happy now, not because of.

Abraham Lincoln quoted: “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”

We have let the little things make us unhappy for so long, it has become a habit to have frustrations, dissatisfaction and irritability. Things that make us that way are a blow to our self esteem, so we react as being unhappy.

You need to stop letting circumstances and other people dictate how you feel. Change your attitude, change your out look and change your feelings. Form the habit of reacting positively toward problems. Practice keeping a positive attitude. Continue to do this and you will be happy in the present and in the future.

Closing on a House – Negotiations and Agreements

There is no doubt that times can be very exciting when an offer is accepted and a new owner knows they can move forward with the purchase and begin closing on a house. From the seller’s side, many of the barriers to buying the property have been taken care of and now it just comes down to the closing logistics, such as the mortgage and inspections, which are meted out with a few rounds of home negotiation between buyer and seller. But (and it’s a big one), sometimes negotiations between home buyers and sellers is an uphill battle that few can accomplish. It’s not enough just to be strong in an offer and budge little by little as you try to show your pride in the process. Some people just throw out tough statements and act rough as if to let the other side know they are not going to be pushed around. Believe me; this way won’t work well in the long run. If anything, it will just turn the other side off to working with you. Good home negotiation comes with understanding the other side’s key points, prioritizing them, and working on overcoming them. It’s one of the best ways to make sure everyone agrees to the same terms when closing on a house.

During this key home negotiation process, real estate agents can be very beneficial . Not only have they taken classes on how to negotiate and reach amiable terms for both sides, but their experience has allowed them to see what works (and when) and what doesn’t when closing on a house. There is a fine level of finesse in the home negotiation process that requires you to know how to get what you want out of the situation.

The Art of Home Negotiation: Understanding the Other Side

When sending the contract offer, you will need to bring up the points you want to negotiate and allow the other side to bring up their points of interest as well. This will usually happen when some of your terms are not accepted and the seller decides to counter your written offer. It is essential for both sides to understand what is important to each other when a buyer is closing on a house. Balance comes from fully understanding the other side’s key points during any home negotiation session.

Internalizing and digesting this information during a home negotiation session will help you compare and contrast this against your own needs. If there is something you aren’t willing to concede when closing on a house, you can use this information to leverage other terms that the seller will easily grant you.

Prioritization of Key Points in the Process

Once you have an understanding of which points are important to you and the other side as well, you will need to also know how those measure up. How important are they for you to continue closing on a house? You will need to know what will be acceptable or become a “must have” to you so that you can feel comfortable before signing on the dotted line and moving to your new house. Whether you are using a real estate agent or writing the offer yourself, you will need to disclose those requests in the written contract offer so that the previous homeowners can legally receive your proposal with what you are petitioning. Since your needs will be in contract form, you can be sure to cover every term or, at the very least, bring up your points for discussion with the seller. If not named or mentioned in your contract offer, you may forget specific terms you want addressed during the home negotiation session and you may lose out on what you really wanted to accomplish. In most cases, the seller is willing to make a number of concessions when closing on a house, and if you’re prepared, you will be able to make it worthwhile for both sides.

If the seller counters on your offer, prioritizing the other side’s key points helps you so you can use some of your requests and offer to give them up if they are willing to do the same on their side. The purpose of both sides is to agree on the most important points when closing on a house. For example, if the seller is willing to include the kitchen appliances but not fix a bathroom you requested to be fixed in your contract offer, this may or may not appeal to you and should fall appropriately within your prioritization scale. Most importantly, however, keep your eyes on the goal during any effective home negotiation session and keep the communication going!

Overcoming the Obstacles on Either Side

Explain why each term you are asking for is crucial during the negotiation process. This is another reason why I strongly suggest that buyers and sellers use agents. It will be something both sides will be able to use to help prioritize what’s important to each, i.e. what you can or can’t live without. Explaining each side helps with persuasion and plays a big part in home negotiation. Obviously, you’ll also want to avoid damaging the relationship that you have with the seller – and closing on a house is where that fine level of finesse plays a large role. Understanding that this meeting of the minds should be a win-win situation for everyone is vital to your approach and ultimate success for effective home negotiation.

The company that I work for (and other similar companies) can help you with closing on a house as well as the numerous other steps that are involved in the home buying process. Using a real estate agent is highly recommended throughout the entire process of closing on a house as they have access to unlimited resources and are trained in home negotiation and getting the best deal for the buyer.

Overcoming the obstacles is easier when you realize you must turn this part of the home buying process into something that’s profitable not only for you but beneficial to the seller as well. This kind of give-and-take when you’re closing on a house will ensure the seller concedes to a great deal of your requests willingly – and maybe even with a smile.

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